Food

The kitchen – yet another room in the house where you might not know what you’re doing. Don’t worry though, MENSGROOM can help you out. (With the cooking that is.) Here are some meals even the most un-chef-like guy can make that’ll have everyone at the dinner table passing out in bloated bliss.

 

Food

Finger-Food That Shows You’ve Moved Beyond Chips & Salsa:

Chips and salsa, they’re kind of like the fast-food of the appetizer world – convenient, tasty, and cheap. But just like fast food, they don’t impress anybody. Especially members of the estrogen set. With that in mind, MENSGROOM has come up with these tasty little numbers that are no hassle and all taste:

Spinach Parmesan balls

- 2 x 10 oz. boxes frozen spinach thawed
- 5 eggs
- 1 large onion, minced
- 10 tbsp. butter or margarine, melted
- 1 cup shredded Parmesan cheese
- 2 garlic cloves, minced
- 1/2 tsp. cayenne pepper
- 1 3/4 cups Italian-style bread crumbs

Juice up your oven to 350°F. Squeeze the spinach dry after it thaws, then drop into a large mixing bowl. Throw all other ingredients into the bowl, stick your hands in and get to mixin’. (You could wear rubber gloves to do this, but that would be lame.) After you’ve successfully created spinach and Parmesan mush, start forming one-inch balls. (We said balls.) Put your balls close together on a baking sheet, then bake ‘em in the top half of the oven for 20-25. Let cool for about 5 minutes, then commence stuffing your face and making all the testicle jokes you want. Makes about 30-40 balls.

Bacon-Cream Cheese Stuffed Mushrooms

- 8 oz. cream cheese, softened
- 4-6 strips of bacon, fried and crumbled (reserve fat)
- 1 small onion, finely chopped
- 20-25 large mushrooms, stems removed & finely chopped

Again, put your oven up to 350°F. Sauté onion and stems in bacon fat in a frying pan until tender (We’d like to take this moment to thank whoever invented bacon, and nominate that person for sainthood.) Now then, drain off excess fat. Mix crumbled bacon, onion and stems with softened cream cheese until the mixture is workable. Stuff each mushroom and bake for 10-15 minutes. Finish under the broiler just until tops are golden. Remove from the oven, let sit for 5 minutes, then sit back and enjoy.

Food

A Meal Fit for a Man (and Easy Enough for One to Make):

Don’t cook much – or at all – for yourself? Well you should. Not only is it more economical than eating out, it’s a lot healthier and tastes better if done right. Plus there’s the side benefit of upstaging your mom when you’re home for the holidays. So here’s a so-simple-it’s-stupid recipe for a main course that’s guaranteed to make everyone ask for seconds:

 

Beer Marinated Flank Steak

- 1 large onion, thinly sliced
- 2 garlic cloves, finely chopped
- 1/2 cup vegetable oil
- 1 cup beer of your choice
- 1/2 cup lemon juice (fresh or not, doesn’t matter)
- 2 tbsp. light brown sugar
- 1 tbsp. Worcestershire sauce (pronounce it however you want)
- 1 x 1 1/2 pound flank steak

In a medium size frying pan, cook the onion and garlic in 1/4 cup of the oil until tender, remove pan from heat. Throw everything else in the pan except the meat. Place steak in shallow dish, then pour the liquid from the pan over the meat and marinade for at least 6 hours. During this time you can drink lots of beer. When you can’t stand your craving any more for animal flesh, pull out the steak and throw it on the grill or under the broiler until done, about 5 minutes per side. Remove from heat and let stand for 5-7 minutes, then slice against the grain and eat. Beer – is there anything it can’t do?

Food

Meeeat:

Is there anything better? Honestly, what beats a 2-inch thick steak? Or big breast of chicken? Or butterflied pork chop? Excuse us while we go kill something and eat it. While we’re out, here are the only marinades you’ll ever need:

 

Steak:

- 1/4 cup steak sauce
- 2 tbsp. lime juice
- 2 tbsp. brown sugar
- 1/2 tsp. ground red pepper

Mix steak sauce, lime juice, brown sugar and red pepper in a bowl. Put your meat in a shallow dish, then cover with marinade and let it stew in the fridge for hours. The longer the better. Makes enough for 2 servings.

Italian Beer Marinade for Chicken:

- 1 cup Italian dressing
- 12 oz. of your favorite brew
- 2 tbsp. garlic, minced
- 1 tsp. black pepper

Throw everything together, pour over chicken and let your bird chill in the fridge for at least 8 hours. Makes enough for up to 3 lbs. of chicken.

 

Pork Chop Marinade

- 1 cup soy sauce
- 1/4 cup honey
- 1 clove garlic minced
- 1/2 tsp. ginger

Alright, in case you haven’t gotten the message yet, mix all this stuff in a bowl, then coat yer chops with the mixture and let them sit in the fridge overnight. Makes enough for 12 chops.